How to Scare off a Mexican Woman

I have found a way to repel young attractive Mexican women, just take my hat off.  This is a very funny and true story that happened to me this past week.  But first a back drop to the story. I will keep the names and locations of this story out, because I don’t want to embarrass anybody, and to protect the innocent.

One day last week I was working my way back to my place where I live.  I had an interesting day already, and I stopped at the lighthouse on my way home. It was dusk and the sun was going down, so I decided to sit on a bench at the lighthouse, and take it all in. I had just left a friend’s house, where we had sat around and talked to some Mexicans and Argentinians, and then we had chicken soup for dinner.  So at dusk I left there to head home.

So I was sitting there in the dark by myself at the lighthouse, when out of the corner of my eye I noticed a Mexican women come up and sit on another bench close to mine.  Well I was in no hurry, and I was enjoying the night air, and the breeze.  I had my prescription sun glasses still on, so it was dark, so I did not know if I knew the woman or not, or if she was a local.  From what I could tell in the dark, she looked pretty slim, and looked kind of young, and seemed to be attractive.  Now I am not one of those gringos here that is always trying to pick up or hit on Mexican women, like we get around here a lot.  We were only people at the lighthouse, so I just kept to myself and just was enjoying the night.

Well we just both sat there in silence for about 10 or 15 minutes, when a bunch of people starting walking up and down the beach with flashlights.  It looked like they were looking for something, or searching.  I then asked the woman on the bench if she spoke English, and if she did, did she know what the people with the flashlights on the beach were doing. She answered back in perfect English, “I don’t know, but I will go ask”.  I told here she did not have to do that, I was just curious because I had met a guy earlier who had found a bag of silver on the beach while he was doing some construction work.  I told her I was just wondering if they were looking for something, it was not that important.

We then starting talking in English, and she asked me if I lived in Mahahual and a bunch of other questions about Mahahual.  I did my usual routine, and told her how I got here, and what I do, etc.  I was very surprised at how well she spoke English, and she seemed very well educated.  She then told me she was from Mexico City, and she was here on vacation.  She has a professional job in Mexico City which requires her to travel to the USA a lot, and to speak English with her clients.  I also think she has a degree from a university where she learned to speak English.  Anyway she was very intelligent, and a good conversationalist, and we sat and talked quite a while.

She asked me a lot of questions about Mahahual, and told me she planned to go to Bacalar the next day.  I told her she would love Bacalar, and to be sure to go the pirate museum there.  I then told her she should come by on cruise ship day at the Tropicante and see me, and take in all the American tourists in town, she would like that.  She said she would, and I told her I would get her some cerviche for lunch for her to try.

So after talking for a while she left to go to her hotel, because she was going to Bacalar early in the morning, and I headed back to my place.  Well I got home, turned on the computer, and noticed there was a Facebook friend request from this woman, who I had just left ten minutes before.  So I accepted, even though, I thought man that was quick, I must have made a good impression.  I did not think any more about it, and went about my business.

A couple of days later, I am sitting on the malecon on cruise ship day, and she shows up at about lunch time.  It is my first time I have seen her in the daylight, and I noticed she was young and quite attractive, and I was wondering, what in the world is she doing talking to an old man like me.  We had some lunch at the Tropicante, cerviche and nachos, the typical tourist meal I told her, and we talked some more.

I could tell she was really getting into watching and listening to the cruise ship tourists. There were some people off the cruise ship in town from last year, that I had met that were from my hometown of Greenville, South Carolina.  I took her with me to their table, and we sat around and talked with the two couples.  They really took a shine to her, and they starting asking her a lot of questions about her life, and living in Mexico.  So we sat there all afternoon, and everybody had a good time, and I think she enjoyed mingling with the Americans, because she has a lot of contact with Americans in her job.

After a good day on the beach the cruise ship left, and the woman asked me if I wanted to meet her later at a local pizza place for dinner, they were having music.  She was going to an African dance class and would meet me there later at around 7pm.  I thought for a second, there are two football games on tonight, but I can watch one at the restaurant maybe, so why not meet her for dinner, I thought.  She also said she was going to pay for dinner, because I had taken care of her lunch.  Now you have to remember, she is young and attractive, so I said sure I will meet you for dinner.

Much to my amazement she showed up on time, (Mexican women never show up on time), just after I got there.  Well we have pizza and a couple of beers and talk, and the whole time I am checking out the football game on TV out of the corner of my eye.  Well we are talking, and she was telling me she may come back in a year or whatever, and maybe I should visit in Mexico City.  So I am there thinking to myself, this woman is young and attractive, why is she hanging out with me.  So I asked her, how old do you think I am?  She told me she thought I was 63 or 65 years old.  I told her no, I am just 57 and will be 58 next week.  She then said, “Oh age doesn’t matter”, or something like that.

I thought for a moment, and then I told her, I had something very important to show her. She of course, said, “What is it?”  I then took off my hat and rubbed my hand over the bald top of my head, and said, “This”.  Her eyes got real big and she turned to the bar, and said “La cuenta, la cuenta”.  Which in English means, ” the check, the check”.  She paid the tab, jumped in a cab, and I have not seen her or heard from her since.

Me with hair.


Thanks for reading,

Stewart Rogers USA-South Carolina


3 thoughts on “How to Scare off a Mexican Woman

  1. Jajaja you really must have scared her. I remember the days in MX when young women went nowhere without a chaperone. The US male students complained all the time that they couldn’t talk to MX girls. Those days are long gone.

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